=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= What Happened To You -------------------- Ever have a person you met turn into a pretty good friend. Someone whom you could hang out with and talk a lot of shit? Then, after thinking you knew this person so well something about them changed. Something you could not understand or relate to. Almost as if your old friend had died and a new one had taken their place. Maybe you thought this change could be good but unfortunately their new persona didn't include you so it was as if your friend actually did die. I had a friend like that. This is the story of how he changed...for better or for worse. Senior year of High School a couple of friends and I were getting ready to shove off to college. One of my closest friends, Mark, began acting a little differently that year. Perhaps it was the excitement he anticipated with college in the coming year. Mark and I got along pretty well--we both seemed to fit into that "nerd/geek" category at our school. A couple of people passing through with few friends and not belonging to any special "cool" club or group unless you would call the Astronomy or Computer club cool. Thinking back Mark probably had more so called "friends" then I did though we did know quite a few people. We all "know" people but talking and hanging out with them was something totally different. One class we had in common was Computers. In this class there were about 30 people--22 taking Pascal and 8 of us taking FORTRAN/ML. We programmed on an Apple IIe which Mark had at home and could do any/all of his assignments on. This gave Mark quite an advantage over me and I expected it to show in his grades. I don't recall much of the class or the people but I do recall seeing the grades posted that 3rd quarter and discovering Mark had gotten a D or F. I had concluded it was Mark because I noticed he was slacking during that period--plus I knew the other 6 people taking the class. This is the first time I noticed a change in Mark. He seemed to be slipping not only in computers but in all his classes--maybe because he had been accepted at the university. Mark was excited about attending college but he and I knew Engineering/Physics was no easy road so why was there a lack of effort his final semesters of High School. Though Mark and I were good friends we decided not to room together at college for various reasons. Among them being that we did not want to hate each other after living together--a horror story we heard about. Furthermore by rooming with others we would meet new friends and perhaps not be so withdrawn. We graduated that May (1988) and were off to college after a Summer of work at the same store. That Fall we found ourselves at college 300 miles from our homes. We met new friends and lived not 100 yards from each other but ended up hanging out/talking much less than we did in high school. Mark only visited me a few times, and hardly ever called. It seemed I was always the caller or visitor at his place. Either it was me going to Mark or it was no seeing Mark. We ended up becoming further and further apart. This saddened me because Mark and I were good friends in high school and I anticipated an even better friendship to develop during our college years. But Mark had different plans. One Saturday night while hanging out in the dorm room I glanced out my window to see if I could spot what was happening over at Mark's place. I noticed Mark sitting in a chair laughing and moving his head quite a bit like he was in a drunken mode. I check that window about four times that night just to see if Mark was continuing to have a hell of a good time. And that was it! I had then figured it out. Mark had come to college to "have a great time." Fuck studying and college for the sake of learning Mark was out to party. I learned of Marks intentions after repeatedly visiting him and having his roommates tell me they had not seen him for days and the last time they saw him he was drunk. That story by him of living off the vending machines for three days seems remotly possible now. Later that first semester Mark and I passed each other as I was heading back to my dorm. Mark asks how my "sex life was." So I asked him "what sex life" then returned the same question. Mark replied "great" and proceeded to walk off with a smile. It was then and a few tell tale signs later that I fully understood Marks intentions for these few months of his life--party, drink, fuck...enjoy life. The next semester came and I discovered Mark was no longer living on campus but with a friend in a 1 bedroom apartment off campus. By this time we had hardly seen each other anymore and I learned of his moving via his old roommates and not by him. About Spring time of that second semester I learned that Mark had not registered for classes, VAX'ed most the day and was later picked up and moved back home by his dad. A year (not sure if it was a year or actually months) later Mark joined the Air Force. Perhaps this might be typical of college freshmen but for Mark or what I knew to be Mark this was a quantum leap. I've always been curious about what happened to Mark during that year but never got any real answers from him. Mark claimed to have gotten good grades that semester yet his roommates claimed he would have had to have been a "fucking genius" to get the grades he said he did. Why else would Mark have re-taken Calculus at a community college. Mark and I still talk on the phone every so often (year or so) but Mark is a different then the kid I once knew in High School. It is hard to believe Mark is a married man now--especially if you knew him in high school. It took a lot of strength to change the way Mark did--to transgress from a semi introverted person to a "party animal." Strength I have yet to find within myself. When I look back at Mark and his exploits I often wonder why I was not included--maybe because I often resist change. It's hard to see a friend go out like that and forget about you. Even harder to swallow is that perhaps you were not the friend you made your self out to be. -Pallbearer =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Questions, Comments, Bitches, Ideas, Rants, Death Threats, etc etc... = = Internet : jericho@netcom.com = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Chemical Persuasion 203.324.0894 Celestial Woodlands 214.252.6455 = = Ionic Destruction 215.722.0570 Hacker's Haven 303.343.4053 = = E.L.F. (NUP) 314.272.3426 Misery 318.625.4532 = = Dungeon Sys. 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